April 2013
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soooooo
i was diagnosed with a mood disorder by a man with menacingly melancholy blueberry socks and an appealing accent
i start lithium soon
i start trying to claw my face off with all the fury of havoc humped harpy talons now
im not well
i cried in the car
i do not want to need help. But i also want to not feel dead inside??? So i guess I’ll have to make a fucking...
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we have to fill out paper work before i see my new psychologist. And after asking me if i was addicted to meth or gambling on grumbling gator scuttling relay races or dangerous cult like castration in maniacal and monstrous sexual encounters or if i ever had immoral or illegal fantasies - like incest (and then homosexuality was an option after incest and pedophilia and I ??? !! WHAT THE...
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well
that synopsis took an unexpected turn there at the end
adolescent lust will often lead to unfortunate lycanthropy though. It is known.
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i talked to my brother today
on the PHONE
and he gave me TECHNOLOGICAL INSTRUCTIONS
that i KIND OF SORT OF COMPREHENDED
i love my brother in the way you love someone who is very different from who you want to be, and you only see them occasionally and in large doses they can kinda be a dick and they eat all the salsa in one sitting and they tattle on you when you purge croutons and...
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rodneykong:
shoutout to me for still not having my driver’s license
apparently my jubilantly festive silly putty went through the washing machine with a load of precious cotton cargo and now my shirt is in RUINS
and im not medicated currently, so i wasn’t going to accept any blame so i screamed “STOP BUYING ME SILLY PUTTY AND SLINKIES. I HAVE TOO MANY. THEY ALWAYS END UP CAUSING CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION”
my mom had forgotten to buy butter tho, so...
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send me a '★' and i'll put my ipod on shuffle and...
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im in one of those “you’re a miserable ball of mucus and a shitty excuse for a writer and your thighs are the size of a rhino’s testicles engorged with deformed dishonor” moods
so time to inject soup into my veins so i can become a liquefied delight
all i can do tonight is watch zombies be dismembered and vanquish the urge to chop off my own spastic limbs
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turnonthewater asked: First name:
Elisabeth Nickname:
Libbay, Lizard Lover, yum yum, pickle, dog lady Age:
17Gender:
female Sexual Orientation: You like girls and certain boys but you hate people
Nationality:
You're american Relationship status:
single Likes:
dogs, cheese, Maggoe, cooking mama Dislikes:
The majority of penises, dog poop, school Random fact: you don't like other people to use your...
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jaaaaaaaaaackfrost:
NICKNAMES
PEOPLE GIVING YOU A NICKNAME
PEOPLE ALWAYS CALLING YOU BY THAT NICKNAME
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How Well Do Your Followers Know You?
uncutting:
Fill this out in my ask box! One point for every correct answer. Ten points total plus bonus points for multiple correct answers. I’ll reply with your total score!
First name: Nickname: Age: Gender: Sexual Orientation: Nationality: Relationship status: Likes: Dislikes: Random fact:
this could be fun
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So I need a favor from you guys
turnonthewater:
I have a crush on someone and I know he doesn’t like me back, it’s just not even possible. So how do y’all get over crushes?
cast a hex on him using the infectiously ingenious ingredients of the toupee of a ticklish toad into murder mystery themed sparkling sweet sixteens and spoiled milk as chunky and alabaster as me. That will surely win his heart, and his loins will bloom...
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the continued legend of maggoe and libbay and their absurd and demented textual spiels
IT JUST REALLY BOTHERS ME. AMBUSHINGLY IS PROPER AND DIGNIFIED AND SHOULD BE CROWNED THE IMPRESSIVE AND ILLUSTRIOUS WORD OF THE YEAR
also here’s a picture of my bed shelf. A lot of craziness and catastrophe is occurring in this moment
the blue doll of dismay just given up on life,...
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the tiny eiffel tower is matted in my terrible tendrils
im not at all patriotic though, so i feel fine that my hair has become barbarically associated with another country. it is knotted in there DEEP
croissants are going to begin blooming out of every orifice and by morning i will actually become france
im very lonely and lardy so i suppose now is the time to watch courage the...
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vasha—ptichka said: i’m dumb and i’ve been following you (sounds creepy) for ages but are you gay or do you just have an affinity for all things homosexual? also your icon is lemongrab and i could never unlove you for this.
hahahaha no, by homosexual i mean i want to screw and possibly marry a plethora of women??
so
yeah, surprise! or not really. Either way I’ll probably appreciate...
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we got the free trial period of netflix. Besides having not left my bed to urinate in about 34 hours, all is well. I might burst, and all my sunny d hopes and dreams may rupture and soil this prestigious blanket cave but otherwise i am good
i made my mom check VERY GODDAMN INTERESTED in gay cinema
so as we were scrolling it was just lesbians galore. It was basically what i wish high school was...
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WOW MAMA, HOW LONG HAVE I BEEN BURNING THAT CANDLE. i knew it was strange that things smelled so clean!!! that is way to much freshness for one ignition period CHRIST I DILUTED THE WAX SUBSTANTIALLY. FUCK NO. MY ROOM SMELLS SO HEAVENLY THIS IS A DISASTER
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my dad was pouting and making way too many cinnamon rolls. That seems improbable, how can there ever be a surplus of scrumptious heaven buns, but it was seriously alarming -so i went with him to that tom cruise movie. And i always get nachos because i have conquered anorexia and artificial cheddar goop patches the gaping wound in my soul. But the machine was malfunctioning, and i made eye contact...
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